In mid November I left a job that had me crying every day. I had no plan, no next steps, and no back up plan. I just walked away. I took the entire month of December off. I turned down or left three jobs. One of which was paying me more money than I ever thought I would make. At times I felt like I was walking in a fog. There were days I did not shower, I stayed in jammies, and I just sort of laid on my couch. Waves of stress, depression, hope, fear, worry, and hope would wash over me.
Did I mention I had no plan?
On a whim I applied for a position I had somehow overlooked despite my constant scouring.
When I hit apply I knew that I would get this job.
Days later I had a phone screening then an interview. The job is almost 100 miles away from where I am living right now.
I searched housing. There was a house I loved. Clear view of the mountains.
When I hit apply I knew I would get the house.
Yesterday I picked up my keys.
I should feel overwhelmed, nervous, and scared.
I do not.
There is a plan for me. A plan for my life. Something bigger than I can ever dream. When I try to make my own path it never works. I can list all the times deep down I knew I shouldn’t take the steps. I resist what I should be doing. Who I should have in my life.
When I let go. It just happens. I can count the times I have done this and felt pure joy. I can’t keep track of the times I have not and hit walls and been in the dark.
I sit in my house, surrounded by boxes and mess. Drinking a cup of coffee, smiling at my puppy. Ready to head to Colorado Springs. Ready to again be Assistant Principal.
I am ready.
Not because I have prepared. I am ready because I know this is the road to take.
This new chapter is built on faith and trust. Control and dictation have been removed. It is going to be amazing.
